RANDOM - Ubisoft unveil limited “Jabba’s Faeces” edition of Star Wars: Outlaws

Kicking up a stink.

By Randy Pitchfork
24/04/24

When a digital artbook isn’t stimulating your midi-chlorians, fear not my young padawan. Ubisoft have your backs, and also the cheat code to your bank balance. “Jabba’s Faeces”, the stink-tastic special edition of Star Wars: Outlaws, is going to leave you reaching for the flush. You think you know special editions? You don’t know nothing until you’ve smelt what this Hutt has dealt.

Featuring a malleable texture design and 4D smell-o-vision, the £270 package of regret is loaded with excrement. Plus, you’ll gain access to the exclusive “Hutt’s Janitor” mission, which sees you take on the role of Greedo’s cousin in an attempt to flush a stinker from Jabba’s Palace all the way to the Outer Rim.

Evee Guilotine (I trust I’m pronouncing that correctly) gave a statement regarding this surprising announcement. “We thought we’d reached the limit of how to monetise special editions with each of our major franchises, but a nug this hefty was too potent to resist. We think our players will enjoy smelling the duplicity of this shit from a mile away”.